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12 vital takeaways from Liam Gallagher’s 50-second interview at the ‘Supersonic’ premiere

The new Oasis documentary Supersonic premiered over the weekend in the United Kingdom, and as expected, Liam Gallagher was in rare form. The frontman took part in a discussion with director Mat Whitecross, but the real gems came during a red carpet interview with Sky News.

In less than a minute, Gallagher was able to:

1) Debunk Oasis’ breakup
2) Compare the band’s hiatus to retired footballer Kevin Keegan
3) Tease that a reunion could happen tomorrow (October 4)
4) Tease that it could happen in a year (October 3, 2017)
5) Tease that it could happen in 10 years (October 3, 2026)
6) Assure us that he won’t beg Noel to come back
7) Declare “they’ll be no cap in the hand”
8) Confirm there will also be no “banjo and a little fucking skinny string dog” outside Noel’s house
9) Confirm that if a reunion doesn’t happen, he will move on
10) Confirm Noel would not be attending the premiere because he’s “in one of his really really really really really really really really really really big” houses
11) Suggest that in that really (x10) big house, Noel is probably eating tofu
12) And reveal that Noel is probably busy getting a face peel

“Ain’t that right, man of the people?”

Supersonic gets a Cambridge screening later this month, a one-night-only affair October 26 at the Kendall Square Cinema. Click here for showtimes and advance tickets.

[h/t XL102]